10 Funny Sayings For Saturday!

1.  I used to think that you were a pain in the neck. My opinion of you has dropped significantly lower since then.
2.  I weighed myself today. It is clear I am too small for my weight.
3.  If a man said he’ll fix it, he’ll fix it. There is no need to nag him every 6 months about it.
4.  I wonder what the hairstylist does for a living…
5.  I would like to apologize to anyone whom I haven’t offended yet. Please be patient, I will get to you shortly.
6. I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side, my legs for always supporting me, and my fingers, because I can always count on them.
7.  I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it.
8. I wouldn’t exactly say I’m lazy but it’s a good thing that breathing is a reflex.
9.  I’m jealous of my parents, I’ll never have a kid as cool as them.
10.  I’m never late. The others are simply too early!